Thursday, January 22, 2015

50 is just a number----

Today is my 50th birthday.  AHHHHH...  When I turned 20 I flipped out because I wasn't a teenager anymore.  When I turned 30 I spent over an hour crying to my brother because my life wasn't what I wanted and I hadn't accomplished what I wanted by that time.  When I turned 40 I was in a great place.  I had just moved to AZ had my first warm, sunny birthday of my life. I had 3 perfect kids and was having a home built. My 40s were tumultuous to say the least but they also changed me as lessons often do. 50 is here and I am excited!!!  My life is an empty book and I hold the pen.

I woke up this morning to the one thing I was wanting more than anything--day made.  And I hadn't even gotten out of bed or uttered a word to anyone!  Sweet! I heard someone (R) downstairs emptying the dishwasher.  I had all three of my kids hug and kiss me and wish me a happy birthday (my daughter before she even had her eyes open!)--amazing!  She made me a beautiful card telling me how I am her inspiration and how she always appreciates me.  Yea, this 50 thing was gonna work out just fine!  I opened a beautiful bracelet from my siblings and sibling in laws and nieces and nephews.  I truly could have called it a day and been a very happy girl.

Apparently my dog didn't get the memo because she threw up on the floor but hey, even that wasn't gonna bring me down lol.  I was thinking about how lucky I am to be 50 and have such a strong support system in my world.  I am healthy, thank you God, I feel fantastic.  I have had 5 people in the last 3 months tell me I look 36 and I didn't even pay them!  Life is good.  I don't even know where the day went I didn't do anything out of the ordinary but it was terrific!  My son (D) came home from school with a dozen roses for me and my siblings sent me another surprise too.  I was feeling crazy spoiled!

I realized something this year.  Every day of my life is one that should be celebrated.  It's a gift.  My birthday is just a day that everyone else can join in the party.  And that is the difference in me.  I finally GET it.  Appreciate every single moment and cherish those who love you.  Forget those who don't.  So many people in my world are getting divorced and having relationship issues and it makes me realize I am blessed to have had an easy divorce.  My kids supported me one thousand percent and are happy if I'm happy.  Not everyone is so lucky.  I have little to no dealings with my ex so there is little stress or frustration coming from that area.  My life is good.  Blessed beyond measure I am.

Don't roll your eyes, it's true!  Look at your life.  When was the last time you counted YOUR blessings?  They are there.  I guarantee it.  And before you think, well she's got no problems--WRONG!  My mother is extremely sick and living 2500 miles away, my son had cancer at the age of 10, both of my sons had surgeries this year, I'm a single mom raising 3 kids of varying ages (not easy trust me), I'm trying to navigate sending my 2nd son to college after having the oldest decide it wasn't for him, I've been betrayed, taken advantage of in friendships, had horrible relationships-  the list goes on, but I don't focus on that.  I choose to look at my blessings.  And you should too!  I can assure you if you do, your life will transform over night.  Turn a negative into a positive.  Maybe the person you love the most in the world isn't with you right now---be grateful that you have that love and that person loves you back.  Have faith that when the time is right you will be together.  Is money your issue?  Do you have food to eat, a bed to sleep in, a roof over your head?  Be grateful for those things, some don't.  Has someone close to you passed away?  That's a tough one, I'm sure, but focus on the happy times and the blessings you had by having that person in your life.  Trust me, you will never regret changing your thinking.  It works miracles.

As I look forward to the next 50 years of my life (my kids have assured me I will live to be 100) I can't wait to see what it holds in store.  Now that I've learned the tough lessons I have faith that the rest of my life will be as sweet as the chocolate cake I plan to dig into tonight <3

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