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Tuesday, August 26, 2014

Letter to my future daughter in law...Danny's wife

Dear Daughter in love....

Regardless of what people might tell you I do love you and welcome you into my family.  If my son has chosen you, you must be pretty amazing.  All I ask of you is that you treat my son like the gem that he is and you don't ever try to come between him and his siblings.  They will love you, because they love him, so it shouldn't be difficult.  As long as you love him we should be good.

I want to tell you a little bit about the man you have married....things you don't know because you haven't been around since he was born.  He's been through a LOT and I want you to always remember how blessed you are to have him!  Yes, even when he's annoying the bejeezus out of you ---he's a gift.  Believe me, I will tell him often that he is blessed to have you too, I don't play favorites :)

Danny is an amazing person, but you already know that or you wouldn't have married him.  Today he is recovering from shoulder surgery at the age of 16.  He is a champion.  Most people who have been through what he has would be cranky and jaded and have a woe is me attitude.  Not your husband.  He just takes it all with a smile and a great attitude.  He keeps apologizing to me for me having to do everything for him---little does he know (between me and you) I love it!  I love taking care of him.  I love the fact that he LETS me.  Some "patients" will whine and complain or try to play the hero and do everything themselves, then make it worse and wind up making everyone around them miserable.  Not Danny.  He sweetly says, mom can you help me.  Mom do you think you could ___fill in the blank.  That ALONE is reason to marry him.  Trust me, not all men are such good patients or as appreciative as the love of your life.  He's amazing.  (you will hear that a lot from me, sorry but he is)

You know that he had cancer at the age of've probably been told the stories a million times...I apologize.  It's a huge part of who he has become and how our relationship became what it is.  Hopefully when you are reading this my son and I are still as close as ever.  Of course YOU will be the main woman in his life and I wouldn't have it any other way.  I raised him to love you and to treat you well.  Ask him....he'll tell you that even when he was in his car seat I would turn around in the car and tell him---"don't ever treat your wife that way" after seeing or hearing something that I felt might influence him otherwise.  He is sweet and loving and thoughtful and kind and you are a very very lucky young lady.  He will treat you like gold as long as you don't give him a reason not to.  My son will give his whole heart and soul to you---don't take it for granted!  You are probably in your 20s and even though you don't realize it you don't know everything.  I've prayed about you since before he was born and I know God did not disappoint.  Whenever you are tempted to get angry at him or hurt him in any way I want you to stop and read this letter first.  Then I want you to read it's not worth it!  Trust is the only thing that matters.  If you talk to him in a calm, loving tone he will listen and understand (trust me---we've had a lot of arguments....I know ).     

Last but not least...treat his heart with gentle, loving care.  He will do the same for you, I can promise you that.  Make sure you two make time for date nights after you have children ----- don't ever feel awkward asking me to babysit or talking to me about anything.  I'm a good listener and well, I'm a pretty great mom because after all---look at the man I gave you to be your husband. <3


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