Monday, June 6, 2016

Love is all you need......

My last few posts have been confused and sad and just awful.  I barely hit post yesterday and everything turned around.  I had a conversation with the man who has changed my life....with the wave of his hand.  A few weeks ago when I first started feeling that sadness and frustration I told him that I needed to go within and find the answer...that God was telling me to fix it myself.  He disagreed (not gonna lie, it's rare...we pretty much agree on everything---always).  He said he thought God was trying to tell me to rely on us...on our love...on him.  It hit my heart and I knew he was right, but I was afraid to listen to it.

I'm writing this to show what happens when you don't listen to that voice...when you fight it because of fear, or disbelief that things can change, or that the guidance you are receiving is really guidance and not just your imagination.  If I had listened to him and to my intuition after he said it I could have saved myself two weeks of torture.  Yesterday I gave in to that knowledge and it all went away.  I feel like myself again and all it took was a wave of his hand and my allowing it to change me.

My friend Jill and I had a conversation about this the other day and she said to me "I find when people aren't moving forward in their lives they are removed from mine"....genius!  That's the answer!  That's why at times I have always felt the need to go within and shut down.  When I took the wall down there were always new people in my life and the people who were causing me to stress or didn't fit in my life were removed.  Sometimes people come back, sometimes they don't.  But I always felt like it was me, something was wrong with me.  But if I believe in positive drawing positive then Jill's statement made perfect sense.

But, for the first time in my life there is one person who I can't shut down from and I truly don't want to.  By fighting that it made me miserable.  Turning TO him instead of FROM him brought me right back to my joyful place.  The joy that he has brought to my life since the moment he said hello.  It sounds hokey...it sounds cliche....it sounds like make believe....but it's not.  It's real.  He proves it to me EVERY day.  The problem comes when I doubt. He is my safe haven.  He is the answer to every prayer I've ever uttered...and I need to realize that it's like nothing else I've ever experienced and believe it.

It's difficult because I have a few people that are close to me that just refuse to take the next step....or they are but like a snail.  They are in my life to teach me patience.  Patience in the fact that everyone takes those steps in their own time at their own pace.  Even if it's clear as day to me what they are being guided to do....it may not be clear to them.  I'm sure my Prince Charming felt that way when he told me I needed to rely on him..

Here's what I've learned....just when you think you have it all figured out and you've evolved as much as you think you can....that's when you will go up to the next level. I guess I felt like I was the happiest I'd ever been so I had succeeded, I got to where I needed to be.  I did it!  But, it's never done.  Life will give you new challenges and new guidance and new people and experiences.  If we stop growing, we die.  The good news is I'm here to tell you that you can always be happier....you can always love more, you can have more fun....just don't be afraid to take that next step.  Don't be afraid to believe that all your dreams CAN come true and don't hold back from taking the necessary steps to make it happen!

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